Saturday, February 18, 2012

Musing on Muses - Melpomene

A Tragedy: Ode to Melpomene and her sisters the Moirae

I had a problem and took it to the Fates.
Clotho, the spinner, I addressed first.  “I wish to change my life,” I said.
Clotho, the youngest, smiled at me and said, "Go to my sister, Lachesis.  I weave your life into being, but she picks your lot in life."
I turned to Lachesis, the middle-aged, to request, "I wish to change my lot in life."
"Your lot is now set and entangled with the lives you affect.”
So, I turned to her sister, Atropos, the eldest and asked, "Can you change my life?"
She turned her rheumy eyes toward mine and croaked, "The change I bring will end your life and you are young, yet. Disentangle your life and live it."
I turned to leave them, unhappy. But, Clotho spoke again. "Why do you wish for this?"
I turned and watched her spin.  "I suffer."
Lachesis laughed.  She plucked up a beautiful string and held it out to me.  The colors of the ocean made up the strand, but the weave was broken and entangled with colors that did not match it.  "You sought colors that didn't suit yours. It is no wonder."
"I thought you controlled my lot," I said.
"No, the gods decreed your free will," she answered. "I choose how much string you shall have."
I lifted the string to my face and studied its twists and breaks.  Suddenly, I saw the design it should have.  I saw my own mistakes.
Then a greater design had lain over my sight and it showed me a beautiful tapestry.  I saw what I should have done and what I should have been.
"She sees," croaked old Atropos as she readied her sharp shears.  Snick went the shears as they sliced through the string.
Down I went, my face stained with tears.  The tears flowed into the wrinkles that had marked my face with age. I had waited too long to turn the page.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Past Revealed for Future Growth

Anyone with a 401K should know that the above photo is good growth for your future. Few know, or believe, that this photo could also represent your karma over the course of past, present, and future lives. I'm not going to get into the "proof" of past lives as much as I'm going to reveal two meditations and the past life information passed on to me for my future growth in this incarnation. For each soul's journey, it is based on personal revelation that doesn't require others to accept for you to learn and grow from it.

Temple of the Sacred Flame

While I was with the Arthurian/Old Welsh pagan group, one person had a good idea to have a writing club of sorts. Once a month, we would get together and present something we have written that helps us in our spiritual growth. At the time I was working on finding an elemental representation for the four corners (that's another term for the points on the compass). I did west first, which was water and by far the easiest. Air was the second easier for east, and north/earth was fairly easy as well.  The only hang up I was having was connecting with fire to get my elemental for the south.

So, I sat down in a meditation determined to break through the block.  What I didn’t realize at the time was what the universe decided to show me as a result.  I will write it below in a story form to give you the whole experience as I felt, saw, and reacted to it.

After my body relaxed, my mind felt suspended between this world and the next.  I could only see darkness until I opened my mind’s eyes and I was standing in another world. 

It was night and I was just outside the stone gate of an impressive stone building.  It was encircled with a stone trench in which a fire burned.  The fire rode up the archway that stood as the entrance into the inner courtyard.  I passed through the entrance and walked down a stone path to the temple.  I knew this place.  It was rectangular with obelisks on the four corners.  Instead of a pyramid cap on the obelisks, a flame topped each one.

I ducked slightly on entering the stone temple and was greeted by servants who directed me to a room to the left where I could shed my clothes and put on a white robe.  Then, I walked through another door on the right where stone benches were set within the middle of the room.  Many were already seated in this room and there was a priest at the head of the room, softly directing a meditation.  I sat down and followed the guided meditation to let go of things past, let go of my negative self and seek inner purification.

After the meditation, there was an antechamber to the right where a servant handed me a strigil and bowl of oil as I passed through into a larger room that blasted me with humidity.  The oil was seasoned with specific herbs from the area to speed up the purifying effects of the sauna – one of which I recognized as cassia oil.  The sauna also had benches like the meditation room, this time laid with cloth so the bench wouldn’t burn you as you sat on it.  Here I applied oil to my exposed skin and use the strigil to slough off the excess as an additional meditation on purification.  After the third application, it was time to enter another antechamber to have the servants take the strigil and empty bowl and hand me a thin cloth to serve as a towel as I pass through into another room to the right.  In this room was a large pool.  I handed a servant the cloth, then slid into the pool, my heated skin from the sauna was cooled by the tepid water and I swam to the other side to the exit. Another servant handed me a cloth and I dried myself the best I could as I entered into the next room.

This is the antechamber to the Sacred Flame.  Knowledge of the legend of the Sacred Flame filled my mind as I walked into this empty chamber where two servants waited on either side of the door to the labyrinth.  Legend around the Sacred Flame was that a god came from the sky and gave mankind the Sacred Flame, starting with the first priest and priestess to tend it.  It was carried within an urn before the temple was built and the Sacred Flame itself gave instructions on what should be within the temple and be required of those coming to seek its wisdom.  The labyrinth was a way of initiating the mind’s higher frequencies before seeing the Sacred Flame and those who do not achieve that higher frequency only saw a bowl in the center of the room the labyrinth ended at with nothing in it. 

A successful person would see a flame within the bowl that needed no oil or some other flammable material to maintain its fire.  No heat would come from the flame either, but it provided light immeasurable.  The Sacred Flame would form a face to speak with or a creature such as a fire drake or dragon for the person to identify with.  If bidden, one must climb the stairs leading to the large bowl and enter the flame for direct communication. 

When I had finished the labyrinth walk, I met the bowl with a flame within.  I was bidden to enter it for direct communication.  Once inside the flame, I was shown myself as a Nubian priestess who once tended the Sacred Flame.  I was shown that Nubians once ruled Egypt and this temple was located in the southern kingdom near the Nubian homelands.  This was before the Great Pyramids were built.  I had six children, all tall and strong and blessed by the Sacred Flame.  Now the Temple of the Sacred Flame only resides in the astral and the Sacred Flame itself was separated into parts and distributed among the priests and priestesses to carry within their person to be reunited at a later date.  War had torn down the temple and scattered its worshippers.

I asked what elemental should be my representative for the south.  The Fire Drake was shown to me. And that ended the meditation.

Twin Flame Meditation

I wasn’t actively seeking my Twin Flame.  I had no idea one existed until Guinevere showed him to me.  I don’t recall much about the meditation, only I was in my special place I designed myself on the astral – an isolated and protected island with a four pointed hut, mountain, white beaches, lush jungle and natural springs and pools.  I was in a garden within the jungle not far from the hut and sitting on a bench talking with Guinevere.  We were arguing about the soul, whether or not it could be split and still reincarnate.  She told me to come back to the hut and she’ll bring someone to prove it.  So, I went back to the star-shaped hut and sat in the middle on a settee and waited.  When Guinevere came back, she was with someone very special to me.

Guinevere wasn’t very tall and neither was I, but the man with her was well over six foot with broad shoulders.  He was wearing a robe of green and white which made him look even taller and thin, so very thin.  His features were boy-like and almost feminine.  His blonde hair was dark, almost a brown, and hung down to his shoulders.  His eyes were brown with hints of green, like hazel.  His nose was petite, lips full, and had a high brow.  Not exactly what I would say as handsome, but there was instant attraction.  Something about him felt raw and familiar all at once.  Guinevere made the introduction, “This is your other half; the Soul that was split from yours many lifetimes ago.  I will leave you both to reacquaint yourselves.”

He came forward slowly and took my hands in his and looked down at me.  “Do you remember me?” he asked.

I shook my head.  I was afraid and not very trusting of my own feelings at the time.  As much as I longed for something like this, I was also very frightened of it from experiences similar in the real world that were wrong and deceiving.  

He sat beside me on the settee and began to tell me a story.  He said he was a woman in the 1400’s in France during the time of Joan of Arc.  He was a widow at the time and his name was Geraldine due to his mother’s German heritage.  I, he said, was a nobleman who owned the lands the village he lived in at the time belonged to.  I was somehow distantly related to the man who claimed to be king of France, but I was also a soldier.  I was married, but the woman was sickly after giving birth to a stillborn child shortly after our first year of marriage.  I had seen Geraldine in the village many times and was very attracted, but it was years before I began seeking her out and became her lover. 

Due to the religious beliefs of the time, I never set aside my barren wife and took Geraldine as my wife.  Geraldine became a “kept woman” and received a stipend each month which grew as she birthed another child she conceived by me. 

I was speechless.  I asked the obvious questions:  What was my name?  What were our children’s names?  What did I look like?  Why tell me all of this?  I was told to go to the Akashic records to look up this life.  If it is to be revealed to me further, I would have my answers.  The guardians who protect the records would give me all I need to know in order to fulfill my work and destiny in this lifetime. 

For several nights of meditation after this initial meeting, we continued to meet and talk.  We shared chakra energy and talked about my karmic debt.  I came up with the name Herald (like Hark the Herald Angels) as a pun on his role in being a messenger of “good tidings”.  I begged him for information about himself and begged to meet him in person on the physical plane, but I was always denied and the begging always ended with him leaving my space on the astral.

Soon he was no longer joining me on the Astral.  I was told by a guide that his time with me was up and I needed to move forward.  It was heart breaking to not see him, but I had a lot of unfinished business and souls to meet and learn lessons from.  With my focus on Herald, I would never move forward and find release from the karmic debt I have built up. 

My fellow writer, and dear friend, DianaMurdock has written a fantastic blog post on this very thing.

What I found out recently was that he has never left me, only stayed away from direct contact.  He looks different now in my mind.  In the past seven years, his shoulders are broader, his hair shorter and darker and his thin body has filled out with lean muscle.  He comes to me in a guide role now and helps me to recharge and raise my vibrational energy.